Pulled In Many Directions

Not-so-daily rambings about my life and my thoughts

Saturday, May 28, 2005

You Know You Drank Too Much When...

I've been on this island longer than those castaways have and I'm still waiting for some feeling of redemption for the things I did in my past.

I know what you're thinking "Dammit, it's only a TV show!" But there's usually a pretty good reason why someone might prefer science fiction to say romance novels. The idea of doing something so wrong and then just not being able to fully let it go, until you get a chance to relive your life almost with a starting over point really appeals to me.

Anyways, I guess the time to start to try to be a better person is now.

I once mentioned liking a band and saying that they sounded poppy, but not in that One Tree Hill kind of way. So now I'll further contradict myself and post the lyrics to a song (the One Tree Hill theme song, actually) that I really like.

"I Don't Want To Be" -- by Gavin DeGraw (theme from "One Tree Hill" -- yeah yeah, shut up already!)

I don't need to be anything other
Than a prison guard's son
I don't need to be anything other
Than a specialist's son
I don't have to be anything other
Than the birth of two souls in one
Part of where I'm going, is knowing where I'm coming from

I don't want to be
Anything other than what I've been trying to be lately
All I have to do
Is think of me and I have peace of mind
I'm tired of looking 'round rooms
Wondering what I've got to do
Or who I'm supposed to be
I don't want to be anything other than me

I'm surrounded by liars everywhere I turn
I'm surrounded by impostors everywhere I turn
I'm surrounded by identity crisis everywhere I turn
Am I the only one who noticed?
I can't be the only one who's learned

I don't want to be
Anything other than what I've been trying to be lately
All I have to do
Is think of me and I have peace of mind
I'm tired of looking 'round rooms
Wondering what I've got to do
Or who I'm supposed to be
I don't want to be anything other than me

Can I have everyone's attention please?
If you're not like this and that, you're gonna have to leave
I came from the mountain
The crust of creation
My whole situtaion-made from clay to stone
And now I'm telling everybody

I don't want to be
Anything other that what I've been trying to be lately
All I have to do
Is think of me and I have peace of mind
I'm tired of looking 'round rooms
Wondering what I've got to do
Or who I'm supposed to be
I don't want to be anything other than me

I don't want to be



I want to be someone who is brave and who can not run scared from things when they get tough and someone who will always (or most of the time) do what's right in a situation. I think in the past, I've let self-righteousness sometimes and fear other times make a mess of everything, and I hope here, where like on the TV show Lost, "moving" to the island has given me a second chance at life, I can really become the person I really want to be, or at least accept the ugly parts I have, and realize that everyone has them.